Crap I've Made from Pinterest: Wedding Edition

The wedding of the season* is just under two weeks away. You know what that means - CRAFTING.

*The "Wedding of the Century" title was already taken by Kate and Wills. Barely.

Saturday night was my bachelorette party! There was wine, Scrabble tile necklaces, bourbon, books, and Motown. And seven of the loveliest ladies you could ever ask for. Basically, it was the perfect evening.

Being me... I had to make a dessert for everyone. I found a recipe for Red Velvet Cheesecake Brownie Bombs and, well, duh. Holy crap are these delicious. And holy crap are they a mess to make. But worth it.

Also, Waterford. NBD.

And then Sunday... ALL THE CRAFTING.

The manfriend keeps saying that if you're going to DIY your wedding, you have to play to your strengths. My strength is... craftiness. Yep.

So! I'm altering my wedding dress, which was once my mom's dress that my grandmother made (see the bottom of this post); making the bridesmaid dresses (no pics until after the wedding!); and making a lot of the decor. With the help of three hung over ladies, we made centerpieces, a card box, an aisle runner, favors, and a quiche (for the eating, not the wedding).

Scrabble tiles! Center pieces!
Please note: my Ginghers are leopard print. That's just how I roll.

Because sometimes the Mod Podge isn't drying fast enough.

Ampersand aisle runner (aka - my college degree is paying off).

That's about $80 worth of M&Ms for the favors. And fried food for the hang overs.

Quiche au fromage!

Ok, so none of this links back to specific Pinterest pins... but we all know. There's burlap and lace all over the place on those wedding boards.

Oh. And we made signs so people can find the bathrooms. Very important.

Here's everything all piled in one corner:

Sigh. Doesn't look like much, does it?

And just for fun - a beard in a dress:

WEDDING!!!

Also, the guacamole.

In order to mark the two month mark (ohmaigawd), another installment of "reasons why I'm marrying him:"

Lately, the manfriend has been working on perfecting his guacamole recipe. It's been tough, but I'm making it through.

Last night, we decided to have TACO NIGHT, which is always a big deal in our house. Obviously, he had to make the guac. And since his friend came over and they ate most of the first batch, they went to the store to get supplies to make a second batch to make sure there was enough for me.

That's love. And really good guacamole.

Just in case anyone wondered why I'm marrying him...

Actual conversation that just happened next to the refrigerator:

Manfriend: Man. What am I going to do if my kids come home some day and say they want to become vegetarians?

Me (laughing): I love you. Because you don't worry about our kids being gay - you worry about them being vegetarians.

Manfriend: Well, being gay isn't a choice.


And I worry about them being Republicans.

D-I-Whhhhyyy!?!

We're trying to do this wedding on the cheap. So far, we've been pretty successful. Until...

INVITATIONS.
(bumbumbum!!!)

Also know as: the bane of my existence.

I thought I'd be all clever and design something in Pages, get the half sheets of card stock (with envelopes!!) from Target, print at home and be done for $30 (plus postage, but whatever).

And it kind of worked. I do love our invitation design. The manfriend is a designer after all - I think we came up with something pretty and classy and just a touch whimsical.

But I might throw our printer out the window.

It had such issue with the card stock. It would not format correctly. We could not figure out how the card stock should lie in the tray for it to print properly. Finally, we were gently placing one sheet at a time in the printer and still had - maybe - a 30% success rate. Our next attempt was Kinko's: they won't print on anything smaller than a full sheet of paper AND they'll charge $1.49 PER CUT. Are you serious?? Yes, we could cut them ourselves - but c'mon. I'm not paying an extra $1.49 per sheet of paper for someone to cut it in half.

We asked a couple friends, no luck there... Finally we just reformatted the invites to fit two on a normal sheet of paper. The manfriend works part time at a university - where they have papercutters. Great. Problem solved.

Except.

I went to Joann's. I went to Target. I went to Staples. I went to Office Max. NO ONE has cream card stock. Let me save you many hours of running around town: go to a stationary store. Yes, it costs more, but you'll save money on gas. And frustration. And maybe even some tears.

At Office Max, I nearly printed the invitations. I tried to not care that the "cream" they had was "orange." I'm trying to not be That Bride. But I just couldn't do it. We're still using the envelopes from the invitation kits I bought at Target - the colors weren't even close.

And so... I went to the fancy paper store. I doubled the cost of our invitations. But we wound up with this beautiful, textured cream card stock. As paper goes, it really is quite beautiful. And the color matches perfectly.

The fancy paper printed beautifully in our cheap printer. Did the manfriend take them to work to cut? Did I take them back to Office Max so they could cut all of them for $2.00 (take that Kinko's!)? Well, no. The invitations weren't quite centered. So, I cut them. With a quilters ruler. And a rotary blade.

Because if we're going to do something ourselves, damn it - we will do it ourselves.

Carnage.

Crap I've Made from Pinterest: Vol. 4

I bought a bundt pan the other day.

Correction: I was killing time at Home Goods, browsing the baking section, because one can never have too many kitchen gadgets. I started investigating bundt pans, trying to decide if I wanted to spend the $9 on a new baking pan -- and promptly dropped it, making an ungodly racket. Obviously, I had to buy it now.

I've always loved the way a bundt cake looks. It's fancy and delicious looking and all you have to do is get it out of the pan. Sure you can frost it or drizzle a glaze on it or even put a potted plant in the hole, but just as they are, bundt cakes are pretty.

Also, I came across this on Pinterest the other day:

Fresh Strawberry Yogurt Cake

Image from www.aspicyperspective.com

I became obsessed with this cake.

Problem #1: I didn't have a bundt pan.
Solution: Buy a bundt pan after making a fool of myself at Home Goods. Check.

Problem #2: The manfriend doesn't like yogurt, even baked into things.
Solution: Tell him I left the yogurt out and allow him to marvel at the delicious moistness of flour. Check.

With those problems neatly cleared away, I was able to move forward. And I had an excellent reason to make this cake: WEDDING. We finally set a date. It's coming up fast. I needed semi-professional help. I went to my good friend Lauren, who is acting as our wedding-planner/person I report to so someone other than me knows things are getting done. And as a thank you, I brought her this cake.

BUNDT!

Holy crap. You guys. This cake is delicious. It's bursting with flavor. It tastes like spring. It is unbelievably moist, even a week later. And it's suuuuper easy to make.

Side note: Not to brag on my mad baking skillz, but it came out in one piece. Since this was my first bundt cake, I'm pretty proud of that fact. It was clearly all due to my skill and had nothing to do with the fact that it was a non-stick pan that I coated with non-stick spray...

I could barely focus on the important and helpful things Lauren was saying while I ate this cake.

If you have a bundt pan, make this cake. If you don't have a bundt pan, go get one. Just don't drop it.

"You could try Sears."

Life is weird, y'all.

Woke up yesterday to no less than nine missed calls from my lovely and talented boss. Apparently Ford Models called and needed a tailor for a photo shoot. Could I go? Um, yes. I believe I can make that happen.

Hopped in the shower, packed up my sewing machine, tried to look somewhat respectable, and headed out the door. An hour and two tolls later, I arrived at my destination.

I'm shown to my corner so I can set up and then go meet with the stylist. You guys - the pins were already in the clothes. All I had to do was put a seam in where the pins were. I didn't even have to iron it. My entire job was to run the clothes through my sewing machine. After I'd been there an hour, they were back on schedule. Because I'm awesome.

What was the photo shoot for, you ask?

Oh. Just the Kardashian Kollection. Because why not??

And just like that - I'm working in the fashion industry. Kinda.

Crap I've Made from Pinterest, Vol. 3

Holy crap. It's been a while... sorry, guys.

I've been working like a crazy person lately, but TODAY, APRIL 13TH is my first day completely and utterly off since Ican'trememberwhen. I'm doing laundry. I went to the grocery. I slept in. I'm having a Normal Person Saturday and it's amazeballs.

And so... I bring you... another installment of:

CRAP I'VE MADE FROM PINTEREST, VOL. 3

I've been making a lot* of crap from Pinterest and not blogging about it.

(*Ok. Not really all that much. But I've been busy, so everything in context, alright??)

So. To catch up:

The Failure

Paleo Chocolate Fudge

First, if you're not familiar with the paleo food craze: as I understand it, it's basically a strictish diet based on what cavemen ate. Meat? Grains? Yep. Pringles? Burgers? Definitely not. Also known as: How My Mother Has Been Eating for Twenty Years. But Martha's always been ahead of her time.

Anyway. I'm not really into the paleo movement, but this looked like guilt-free (or reduced guilt) chocolate and that's always a good thing.

Not mine. I couldn't bring myself to document my failure.

And only five ingredients! Coconut oil, cocoa powder, almond/peanut butter, honey, and vanilla. How hard could this be? Oh, just you wait...

In theory, you mix everything together, put it in muffin tins, and let it set up in the fridge. Voila! Fudge. Unless, like me, you don't have coconut oil on hand and you've maybe had a glass or two of wine and you think, "You know what? Canola oil will be just fine!" LIES. They never got firm and the bit I licked out of the bowl was... not good.

So maybe these are really tasty and easy, but make sure you have the right ingredients. Or just get regular fudge. Like a normal person.

The Successes

Apple Pie Cookies

Pie. In cookie form. Brilliant! Because pies can be difficult and time consuming. And who doesn't love miniature pies?

Again, super easy, minimal ingredients: pre-made refrigerated pie crust, one can of filling, caramel sauce, 1 egg (for the egg wash), and nutmeg/sugar/cinnamon for sprinkling on top. I briefly thought about making crust from scratch and then I got tired. And these turned out AMAZING. I recommend using parchment paper because they ooze everywhere while baking and it'll be easier clean up if you don't have to scrap the pan. And make sure you have plenty of clean counter space to work on because you will make a HUGE mess. A delicious, huge mess.

Adorbs.

The only downside is that this recipe only makes around 10 cookies. But then... maybe that's for the best...

Crunchy Cashew Thai Quinoa Sala with Ginger Peanut Dressing

or (as I was calling it):

Asian Inspired Cashew Quinoa Salad with Peanut Ginger Dressing

Sigh. There is so much awesome in this salad, there's no way to communicate that awesomeness without an incredibly clunky name. Oh well. It's delicious. Go eat it. Oh, and it's vegan and gluten-free. So there's that...

I was chopping as I went instead of being a good cook and prepping everything. So it took probably three times as long as it should have. But hot damn is this tasty. I could have eaten the dressing BY ITSELF. I have no idea what the calorie count is on this, but it has so much healthy crap in it, I don't know if it matters. And it's delicious.

My kitchen currently looks like a produce stand exploded in the middle of it. Totally worth it.